Wednesday, March 14, 2012

29 days later...

I am preparing to go to work and realize I have neglected this far too long. I have reconnected with an online friend within the last couple of weeks, which has been heavenly,  Mr S has turned 5, and requested a cake for his party next week that is 1/2 as tall as he is, The Bob has been enjoying school so much that I am sure one of these days he is going to try to find a way to go every waking hour. And my Boo, is gaining speed with his reading daily. I couldn't be more proud. 

We have had a disappointment in the last 29 days, the house we thought we were going to buy has been taken off the table for us. It was tested for meth and found positive in the house, one outbuilding, and one of the mobile homes on the property. I am sure if we were still keeping track of it, the soil samples would have come back positive too. It breaks my heart because that is the house that my grandparents owned my entire childhood. I had looked forward to creating even more memories there with my children. In other news, anyone want 20 meth tainted acres with a great view of Stockton lake?

I am starting to feel way behind, and overwhelmed with everything that is going on. I have a garden that I am behind in getting seeds started and things planted out in it. My house is a DISASTER Clean laundry in piles, dirty laundry in the back room filling the laundry hamper, a big box of toys in the living room where we took all the toys out of the boys room to try to re-organize and move stuff around the day we thought we were getting a new couch. I suppose we are just going to have to move our old couch out of the boyos room and back into the living room so we have a place for people to sit in the living room other than my rocking chair. The table needs a good scrubbing, the critter cages need cleaned, poor Pumpkin's cage for the last time. The poor guinea pig died a little over a week ago. He was apparently an old man (didn't realize they only lived 4-7 years and he was 4 when we got him over a  year and a half ago) and he got a respiratory infection that despite my best efforts to save him, claimed his life. 

It all seems so overwhelming it is hard to get started sometimes. Especially when I would rather be outside and spending time with the kids while I can while they are little instead of being inside cleaning and being June Cleaver. Don't get me wrong, I love to cook and I have been grilling the last few days for supper and enough left overs for us to have lunch the next day and it has been a breath of fresh air for me. I have also been grabbing little meditation moments here and there. Which have reminded me why it always used to be a daily thing for me. Whatever your version of prayer is, it soothes the soul.

Dennis has been being a huge help, emotionally, and around the house. I just don't know what I would do with out his never ending support, love, and acceptance of my craziness in this world. I have been doing a lot of research on homesteading, because ultimately that is the lifestyle I want to live. Dennis has been helpful in asking questions, listening when I go bulldog on a topic and just keep going on and on about it, but most of all, he hasn't called me crazy. He has agreed that it is a lifestyle for us to work towards together, for us to raise our children that way, and that it would be nice to grow old on a place of our own eating things we raised ourselves. I am truly blessed.

I have done a lot of rambling today, but I think as disjointed as I have felt today it came out with the
writing here. I haven't really opened up and exposed myself yet, but it is coming. I am just reacquainting myself with writing at all. A story is in the works, so perhaps writing on a novel will help me open up more about myself here. Until next time...